Thursday, 10 February 2011

Men vs. Women

Most people have read the book 'Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus'....I would guess that most of the people that have read that book are! I and SO have been talking about the differences between men and women. At the end of the day we both have to exist on one planet...right here on earth! While we academically acknowledge our differences we seem not to actually live with the understanding that we are different.

Sometimes when one of SO's friends calls him up for advice, he asks me for a woman's take on the issue. Because the truth is a lot of misunderstandings are simply that misunderstandings. I come to a conclusion without understanding the facts. I assume and I make an 'ass' out of 'u' and 'me'. In a relationship I'm learning that men and women need different things. I haven't even scratched the surface of what men want or need but I believe that with a lot more love and understanding it doesn't have to be war. There can be peaceful co-existence between the sexes, it doesn't have to be a battle, we are on the same team.

Funny thing is that when men and women have issues we turn to our friends of a similar sex as us to try and interpret what the 'darn ole fool' is up to...I use that term as a! We ask our girlfriends to help us interpret a man we married and probably know better than them. Its not a problem to share with friends but at the end of the day maybe a man can give you a better clue as to what's going on with hubby than another lady. Just saying.

Men and women often use the same words...'I love you', 'I miss you' which could mean very different things. SO says men need to be respected, honoured and appreciated as the 'first among equals'...first among equals, what does that mean. We are Christians and we adhere to the Bible tenet that the husband is the 'head' of the home. By head we do not mean ruler or tyrant but a loving leader. I read somewhere that men need to be their bellies and a little under their bellies. SO agreed with this one so wholeheartedly that I almost burst out laughing. In every book written by a man for women to have better relationships they talk about food and sex. So I guess its pretty important. I'm not a great cook...but I'm learning. I'm used to cooking in a certain way but SO is very well travelled and loves good food. So world cuisine, here we come. I love that he gives a helping hand in the kitchen but I'm determined to be able to 'throw down' there. When I make something he likes he raves and raves about it for ages so its worth it just for that smile.

I pray to be able to satisfy my husband with whatever he needs as long as it is in my power. So when the time comes..Victoria's secrets and all...well bring it on. Although I haven't been serious about working on my body I know that losing a few pounds will help me feel that much more physically attractive. SO rolls his eyes whenever I talk about losing weight, bless him but for me I know its love speaking but I'm really going to try this year to stick to healthier eating habits.

Women need security. A woman needs to know a man will honour her above all else. That's love to a woman. She needs to know she is the only one and that you've got her back. She needs him to provide, protect and pursue. That's not too much is it? Most women need romance, the unexpected messages during the day, helping her out with the dishes at night when you know she's had a hard, long day. Well, its the little things that count. I still like to believe a woman would take a man that really loves her over money. I may be wrong.

I love watching movies with SO because we always find something to talk about afterwards, sometimes we pick up on different things and it helps me find a glimpse into how things work on Mars. Understanding your partner's culture and language goes so far in bridging gaps between you and them. Definitely worth the time and effort.

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